Monday, February 08, 2010
2/08/2010 10:11:00 PM
i'm pissed. pissed with you.
and yeah, if you're asking yourself whether it's you, it probably is.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
2/07/2010 02:50:00 AM
hello everyone, just so you know...
i have facebook.
yeah someone took the liberty of creating an account for me (i've yet to find out who this is actually, but i have a inkling of who it might be.) so i've decided to just embrace it.
therefore. so long principles, hello stalking addictions.
Saturday, February 06, 2010
2/06/2010 08:13:00 AM
you know, i should really be thankful that some things in my life haven't totally just fallen out, crashed and burned. because sometimes i don't deserve what i have, and i think i really need to learn how to cherish everything that i have.
i think i take things for granted. i take it for granted that people will always be there, that people will always make the effort, that everything in life is always going to fall into place. perhaps i didn't use to care because i always thought that there would always be bigger and better things out there for me, but perhaps that is my potential downfall.
it's not about settling, it's about appreciating what you've got and showing gratitude from time to time. yes, i'm an ungrateful bitch sometimes and i think i need to do something about it. be a nicer person and not go around with this god damn attitude all the time.
potentially unpleasant sometimes? yeah i know, it's an understatement.
right now i'm transferring music into my mac and oh my god it takes FOREVER. i guess this is what happens when you have 10000 songs right now, technology can only move so quickly.
ugh, i need to get out. being cooped up in the lost world at really odd hours is messing with my head a little i think. i just finished two graveyard shifts on tuesday and wednesday night (although technically, it was wednesday and thursday morning) plus a morning shift yesterday. apparently that's kinda screwed up being transferred from night to morning because your sleep cycle is all messed up, but i guess since i fell asleep in the break room it's not that bad on my part. yes, i fell asleep at work, which i swear is just AWFUL, thank god my team manager wasn't at work that day.
yes, my life revolves around work. i haven't touched band hero in like a week and it's taking me six days to finally get my iPod running again.
don't get me wrong, i'm grateful for my work (yeah i'm working on the whole more gratitude, less attitude thing), and i'm glad i'm not sitting at a desk all day. being so damn tired all the time is the thing that SUCKS ASS.
but then again, i was always tired even before work started because i always sleep late anyway.
AHHHHHH. brain not functioning right. i need another 10 hours of sleep.
Friday, February 05, 2010
2/05/2010 08:43:00 PM
OH. MY. GOD.
you know who you are. PLEASE COME AND TALK TO ME SO I CAN SMACK YOU.
i can't believe someone actually did it. i kinda thought they were all empty threats but apparently someone actually went and DID it. ohmygodohmygodohmygod.
OH. MY. GOD. this is so unbelievably creepy.
Monday, February 01, 2010
2/01/2010 06:46:00 PM
civilisation, i'm back.
yes, after more than six months of being practically a hermit, i've gotten a new computer. the macbook's a lot heavier than i expected though, but maybe this is coming from the fact that i was fiddling around with charissa's macbook pro which weighs like a gram. after that anything's going to weight a ton in comparison.
i have no idea what to do with the mac now that i have it though. i guess it's like tom hanks in that movie whereby he was marooned on an island for years and years and when he was finally rescued, everything felt so weird and different. maybe i just need to get used to 1. using a LAPTOP now, and 2. using a mac. coming from the girl who used to survive on office 2000 until 2009, that's like me travelling from a whole different century to this.
why am i not more psyched out about this. hmmmm.
anyway, FREE JOB PERKS. i've been on battlestar cylon, revenge of the mummy and enchanted at work, so i guess the only thing left for me to look forward to is battlestar human. i swear, inverted coasters are officially my new love affair because the feeling of being on one is AMAZING. but then again i've never been on one of those things that take you like twenty storeys up and plummet you all the way down in 3 seconds, so maybe i'm not the best person to comment. although launching the coaster is a whole different story, you wouldn't ever think that pressing one button wrongly could lead to so many potential adverse consequences. THINK ABOUT IT, oh my god.
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA CYLONS VS HUMANS DUELLING COASTER WHOOHOO!!!!!
all i need to do now is go on the human one and my life will be complete for the next six months until i find something new to look forward to.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
1/19/2010 10:00:00 PM
I AM AT AARON'S HOUSE CHILLING.
like seriously, i've never been to a friend's house to just chill before. there's always something to do, there's always a reason to be there. but today it's just HEY LET'S HANG OUT, and that's what we're doing.
this feels like a real waste of time, but i guess it's a nice change in comparison to all that activity. and after the shit that was this morning, it's nice to have the opportunity to just chill and do nothing.
OH, and i did something totally un-gretchen today, which was STALKING PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK (celine are you proud of me!!!!!!!!!!). yes, access to a facebook account and the first thing i do is stalk people. says so much about my willpower.
but this does NOT mean i'm getting facebook, because i have principles. just like how i refused to go play LAN with beat today. if i don't have principles, i have nothing.
I AM BOREEEEEDDDD. and super excited to start work tomorrow, WHEE.
1/19/2010 05:16:00 PM
today was just one of those days i just wanted to rip my hair our, curl up into a ball and wait for everything to just go away and everyone to leave me alone.
i don't know what is it about me, but nothing good ever stays for long. maybe i'm just born paranoid, maybe i'm just giving myself a death sentence before anything even happens, but that's just me. i need to lighten up and stop freaking out so much, but in the meantime i'm just thinking about all the possible scenarios as to how this could completely screw up.
at the same time, being this heavily reliant on anyone, especially people who drive me totally insane, is screwing with my brain. it's just one of those things that you can't explain, but every single thing is annoying the heck out of me, and i feel guilty for that.
i wish i were a better person, but i'm just not. i'm sorry.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
1/14/2010 07:54:00 PM
you know, right now i'm at the point whereby i just want to go OH MY GOD WILL YOU FREAKING CALL ME ALREADY DAMMIT.
i waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant.
1/14/2010 07:14:00 PM
i learnt something today: never EVER say yes when people randomly approach you on the street for anything because chances are a "survey" ends up becoming some of of opportunity for them to hard sell you.
yes, you would think that me, being the ultimate cynic, would have learnt this by now, but NOOOOOOO. usually i'm the type of person that just says no and walks away (or when i'm in a horrible mood, i just pretend these people don't exist), but i was feeling nice and generous today so i said yes to an apparent "survey".
AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW.
anyway these two people tried to sell me some weird protein shake thing that apparently gives you a result in 7 to 10 days. i mean, yes i have a minor weight issue, but OH MY GOD, SERIOUSLY. so i had to listen to the damn woman give a long speech on how she personally lost weight on the thing blah blah blah, and then she proceeded to TOUCH ME. like seriously, just because i tell you i have an issue with my thighs (this was back when i thought this was a god damn survey, so don't judge me) does NOT give you god damn permission to keep touching my thigh. plus every time she said my name i wanted to cringe because OH MY GOD, there is a reason why ah lians are not my friends because she kept saying my name all wrong with strange intonation so that it became GRARE-chen.
and to top it all of SHE KEPT SPITTING ON ME. seriously, maybe if she had kept that to herself i might have been a little bit more receptive. and oh my god, she made me HIGH FIVE HER.
in the end i just threw five bucks at them just so that stupid woman would leave me alone. now i have an appointment tomorrow to further pay for the rest of the product, but i'm just going to go back to take my five bucks.
GOD. don't ever be nice to these people, they end up taking up half an hour of your time during which you get grilled about stuff that shouldn't even matter to people who are selling you a health product, plus what do you know, lucky me, i get a refreshing shower of spit at the same time.
shopping alone is bloody dangerous. dammit, i hope they don't try to hard sell me again tomorrow, if the damn woman spits on me again i swear, i am going to spit on her and tell her where to shove it.
bemusement is not a good expression to have. bloody hell, i am never ever going to put myself in this god damn situation ever again.
IDIOT.
Monday, January 11, 2010
1/11/2010 07:42:00 PM
you know, i never thought i could get so agitated over a person (other than the norm, you know who you are because i tell you all the time.), but OH MY GOD. I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO BLOODY PISSED OFF WITH SOMEONE EVER.
some people just DON'T BLOODY GET IT. and i suppose to a certain degree i'm annoyed because i didn't say all i wanted to, but OH MY GOD. i mean, seriously? SERIOUSLY????????????
ugh i so want to stab someone right now. i need my best friend.
Saturday, January 09, 2010
1/09/2010 06:59:00 PM
i actually can't wait for work to start.
i know i'll probably take it all back when i'm standing in the sun in a silly looking uniform and pressing buttons all day, but right now i'm just super excited about the whole thing. i can't believe i actually get to go there and spend time in a theme park and get PAID FOR IT. that's just unbelievably cool.
right now i'm just either sitting at home and rotting my ass off, or going out and spending money faster than i've ever spent money. it's ridiculous how much money i'm spending on a daily basis on food, shopping, drinks and all that, not to mention the fact that i no longer have concession and i blew 10 bucks on public transport within the span of four bloody days.
OOOOH NATHAN'S AWAKE. i'm going to go poke him while i dream about actually being paid for doing something on a daily basis.
Tuesday, January 05, 2010
1/05/2010 07:51:00 PM
self-contained or self-sufficient? i never know the difference.
Monday, January 04, 2010
1/04/2010 07:23:00 PM
i've finally found the guts to go back to the place i've been avoiding for the past year.
you know, the view from here hasn't exactly been pleasant either. i think it's led to a whole spectrum of emotions from me questioning what exactly it is i feel is important to how exactly i want to portray myself in front of others. i think the answers to these questions have changed numerous times over the past year, and i don't think i've come to a conclusion just yet.
i'd like to think that perhaps this whole issue can be resolved, but at the same time i'm thinking that maybe it's better to just leave it the way it is. resolution might bring about closure, but is closure really that important?
i personally think it's overrated. time heals all wounds, closure can perhaps be alluded to something like stitches just to help the wound heal faster. but at the end of the day it's just an issue of when, rather than if.
i'm afraid of what might be said to me. i'm afraid of opening the can of worms that might already have been shut. it's hard being in this position of not knowing, because i want to do what's best for other people. it's just that being in such a position that makes it difficult, because what exactly is best for others? maybe it's better for me to just shut up.
i think everything i've said and done in the past with regards to this situation, it might have been due to fear. but we can't live our lives being bound by fear, and i'd like for everything to go away. unfortunately, things are easier said that done, and part of me is almost afraid to try. the other part of me is probably just waiting for those involved in the situation to just come to me so i don't have to be the one to get the ball rolling, i personally prefer taking a passive stance in such issues.
the other day, i realised that people actually rely on me to get things done, because most people who know me well enough know that if no action is taken, chances are i'd do it. i rarely do it willingly, it's more of a case of me taking the lead when i feel that others are not going to. it's not that i don't like doing things, it's just that in a group situation i prefer it when people do things for me, or when other people make decisions. experience has taught me that making decisions for other people or taking the lead just makes it easier for people to point fingers at you when everything goes badly, and me being the pessimist that i am, chances are things ARE going to go badly in my head. i'd like to think i'm pretty easy-going, and i'm usually alright with decisions that other people make, but i know that this might not be the case for everyone. so i guess at the end of the day i prefer it when other people make the decision just to that i don't have to be the target for any sort of animosity.
maybe i'm just being too passive and i need to stand up for my own rights. but what's there to stand up for when you honestly don't care about how the situation turns out? i mean, when i care, i will definitely say something about it. it's just that maybe 80 percent of the time, i don't. it's not that i don't have an opinion, it's just that i believe that fighting out where exactly you want to go for dinner is the most STUPID thing ever.
i think i'm being a little angsty, this might potentially be the result of me not spending ANY money today (cab fare doesn't count.).
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
12/29/2009 07:37:00 PM
okay, he's feeding now, and i think he went back to sleep, so i'm going to continue my thing.
anyway, i guess the years's been okay. not fantastic, occasionally terrible, but generally alright, despite the whole fiasco that was a levels. i think i'm prepared to put all that behind me and hopefully move on from here, because the whole thing was just UGH. but it's been a great couple of weeks after the As, with being able to see all my friends again, poking nathan, carolling season and all that jazz. plus lots and lots of band hero parties! i think i'm on the verge of obtaining carpal tunnel syndrome from attempting to hit 100% on "i saw her standing there" on beatles rock band, but maybe that's just me being completely pessimistic as usual. i've still got smash hits to complete, plus i'll probably be getting the cooking mama games (yes i know, SUCH A GIRL.), so i guess i'll be pretty attached to my wii for the time being. yes, a WII, but only because i got it at an awesome discount and i've heard that raving rabbits is the best thing since, uh, toast.
i think i'm developing a thing for those action adventure games though. i was over at edwin's house a couple of weeks back and they were playing some weird game whereby you've got to go around looking for feathers in medieval italy or something? and i didn't fall asleep, YAY TO ME. maybe i've just got strong feelings of adversity towards gaming as a social activity, rather than gaming itself. not that i'm about to go download left 4 dead 2 and start killing zombies the first thing when i get my new computer (arrival state still to be confirmed because my parents are too busy with nathan to head down to starhub to subscribe to a new broadband plan, PFFFT.), but i think i'm beginning to appreciate these new pastimes that most people buy into.
anyway, i guess that the year has taught me that i am 18, and that i'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself. i think for a while i doubted that, and i'm finally realising that it's all in the mind. i think i've never been one to learn stuff from school, especially a lecture system, and i'm far too strong willed to rely on other people to feed me information, which basically means that JC in general wasn't the best thing for me. but i guess going through it sort of reinstated it into my head, and hopefully i'll be able to obtain some life experience in these next few months before hitting the books again, because i think i need life experience more than, well, information on hydrocarbons and statistics.
i think the only thing that i'm hoping for in 2010 is to lose all this excess weight i put on during the exam period, and you'd be amazed to find out how much weight that actually is. hopefully i'LL find some time (and money!) to take up dance lessons, because cardio bores me to death. i swear, all living creatures are only meant to run to escape predators, and i guess mine is the evil fat monster waiting to eat me. BUT STILL.
ugh, running. BLEH.
it's two more days to the new year, since this one's nearly over. good luck everyone, hope 2010's going to be a great year for everyone.
12/29/2009 06:59:00 PM
it's three days to the end of the year, and i don't know if i'm going to be able to sit down at a computer and type my end of year reflections come 31st december because i'm going to be so busy with work and hanging out with friends for the countdown and all, so i'm just going to do my reflections on the year now. i guess it doesn't matter if it's early, because my next two days are going to be spent in an ulu corner of pandan gardens at "an exciting corporate induction program", to quote the email. don't get me wrong, i'm completely excited, despite what my extremely snarky tone might suggest.
oh my god, i actually have to be wary of phishing now.
anyway, nathan's crying in the next room, i think the confinement lady woke him up a little too early from his 20-hour nap. you know, it's amazing how much he sleeps, and the din that he sleeps through. for the first couple of days he pretty much ignored everybody around him, but over the past few days he's started to react to my jabbing, which i SUPPOSE is a good thing? but too bad for me i suppose, that's one form of entertainment out the window.
i still can't believe i'm an aunt.
OH MY GOD, NATHAN'S AWAKE. i need to go jab him, be back for more updates in a bit.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
12/22/2009 08:54:00 PM
hello hello i would like to make a shoutout to NATHAN QUEK whoohoo!!!!!!!!!!
you know, i'm a complete sucker for the whole novelty factor thing. my life has become so jaded over the last couple of years that it's good to have something new in my life, and i'm completely grateful for it. i've spent the last couple of days just being in his company and i think i'm beginning to appreciate the smaller things in life, like the smell of antiseptic. (don't ask.)
seriously, nathan is SO CUTE. i know i'm probably completely biased, but who cares. the best part is that he's completely oblivious to all the jabbing and poking, but the guy's got an attitude, put too many people in the room and he starts to completely freak out.
i'd post pictures but i don't have a usb cable to do that, and it doesn't matter considering how dead this place is. but i SO CAN'T HELP IT, he's just too cute!!!!
i'm an aunt. i am actually an aunt. OMFG.
Friday, December 11, 2009
12/11/2009 07:37:00 PM
so, As are over, prom is over, my days of wearing a uniform are OVER.
i'm just glad that the rest of my life is beginning, although maybe i shouldn't jump the gun just yet. i guess the fact that i won't be going back to school on the 2nd of january is something that hasn't really hit me yet, but i'm sure it will in time to come. it's like, a step into the world of adulthood.
OH MY GOD, GRETCHEN LEE, AN ADULT?????
yeah, the idea is ridiculous, even to me.
entering a new phase of life makes me a little bit retrospective, which kinda sucks because i don't exactly have the luxury of sitting and thinking in front of the computer all day. but on the other hand, i don't think i care that much for a computer anymore. i've survived for 5 months without one, and being in front of one sporadically leaves me so bored i end up on wikipedia all the time.
celine would tell me to GET FACEBOOK!!!!!!!! but personally, i'd rather not. i'd rather not buy into the whole voyeurism thing. okay, i know this might sound a little hypocritical coming from the girl who has twitter and used to swear by beingweirdrocks.blogspot.com, but i don't know. it's all so... arbitrary now.
ahhhhh, time for dinner.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
11/24/2009 03:46:00 PM
SCARY GROUPIE ALERT: ADAM LAMBERT IS THE BOMB.
i can't believe i'm going insane over a gay guy.
Friday, October 30, 2009
10/30/2009 09:03:00 PM
check out the shan and rozz show episode 9 - THE BOOMZ GIRL.
you know what? ris low isn't so bad. she's got the ability to laugh at herself, which is totally cool.
(or at least, i hope she's laughing at herself. if she isn't she's a complete goner.)
but yeah, people need to stop taking things so seriously. shan and rozz are completely fantastic, i'm so sick of ris low getting so much media attention and the media making her out to be some sort of complete psycho.
JUST BECAUSE SHE HAS BI-POLAR DISORDER DOESN'T MAKE HER CRAZY OKAY.
Monday, October 19, 2009
10/19/2009 05:52:00 PM
to passerby: yes... WHO'S THIS I WANT TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE OMG WERE YOU FROM HOLY SPIRIT?????????
excuse me, i'm in the middle of preparation for As and i haven't seen a computer in weeks, so i'm in a little bit of a technological rut. which might kinda explain the blogging dry spell, and i'm kinda bummed about it.
when i get my computer fixed/get a new computer, i promise this place is going to be 100% revived.
you know, not having the time/ability to blog has kinda helped me put things into perspective. i think i'm more far more interesting in writing than in person, and i feel that blogging helps me to bring out that inner, uh, exciting person that i know is totally stashed deep, deep down.
anyway, life's been horrendous. and can you believe that we've actually bloody GRADUATED from JC. after all that hoo-ha, i'm now officially school-less once again. and uh, if i'm not careful, i might end up being school-less for, uh, ever. BUT i will not entertain that thought, NO I WON'T, because i am a smart girl and i am not going to run away from reality.
ugh, i am now THIS CLOSE to becoming a full-fledged adult. i can't believe i'm 18 now, and i can't believe i've been blogging for almost six years. okay, i guess i can't really count the last year as actual blogging, because i update once in three weeks, and even then these three weeks have extended themselves into months because i don't have any access to a computer. i'm at my sister's house right now and i'm supposed to be printing stuff from colac, but the printer is stashed up on the top shelf of the cupboard and i know if i attempt to get it down it'll probably end up giving me a concussion, so let's just forget about it for the time being.
goodness, i realise that blogging was the only reason why i used to have impeccable grammar and spelling (well, most of the time.). now that i don't have the daily practice i confuse "was" with "were" and the other day i ended up saying "bid" when i actually meant "bet". if i don't have my language capabilities i have nothing so OHMYGOD HELP ME.
i'm rambling. i think the thing i miss the most is the sound of the keys, which i find very theraputic.
NEED TO GET COMPUTER FIXED SOON. and i'll spare you from more rambling, i've got a ton of stuff to do.
22 bloody days to As. god help us all.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
9/19/2009 06:59:00 PM
i have no idea what the hell i was expecting, but it sure wasn't this.
i'm officially bitter. yes, i know. i'm eighteen years old and BITTER. like an old hag. with many cats. although i never did quite understand the whole thing with cats though. is it because of the independence and the aloofness associated with cats? does that contribute to the whole "lonely in a crowded place" thing?
but they're cats. you can't talk to them, they just stare at you. i learned this from my new next door neighbours, who have this HUUUGE cat that likes to just sit at the door and scare the living daylight out of me when i'm attempting to get to school at 7am in the morning. it's interesting, it tends to like to wander and walks into the elevator every time it opens, and on occasions you'd see it downstairs just... wandering. but it's a cat, so i guess it's got enough brains not to stand in the way of oncoming traffic or whatever.
anyway, WHATEVER. i'm talking about CATS. GOD.
i hate being emotionally indebted. I HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT.
Monday, July 13, 2009
7/13/2009 06:44:00 PM
see more
Funny Graphs
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
7/08/2009 11:38:00 PM
if you know me well enough, you'd know that i'm the kind of person that doesn't take shit from anybody although, strangely enough, my tolerance level is pretty high. so i suppose, comparatively, there's little shit for me to take anyway.
people say you should always avoid what's bad for you. oily foods, bad habits, all that jazz. but sometimes you just CAN'T because it's just thrown into your face on a regular basis. then what do you do? learn to cope? but that's easier said than done because there's no way you can make something that's bad for you any better. intrinsically, that's the way it is and you can't do anything.
so what are we supposed to do?
i suppose i should be thankful it's all over. but still. you go through certain experiences, wondering if they're supposed to make you stronger. it's hard to appreciate something that makes you feel as if you're about ten centimetres tall, but maybe there are benefits to reap in the future. i don't know, i don't understand some things at all. i believe that everything happens for a reason, but it's unfortunate that sometimes it takes a while before you realise what that reason is.
there have been michael jackson specials all throughout the last one and a half weeks, and today's been crazy because everything on channel 5 got pre-empted by the memorial service. this whole thing's just been a little surreal, but i guess i'm getting over it.
i was never a particularly big MJ fan, i've always been more of an "appreciate from afar" kind of person. but i have to admit that there has never been anybody like michael jackson, and i don't think there'll ever be anyone like him ever again. his music transcends generations, you don't even think of his music as 80s music; it's just music.
our generation grew up knowing michael jackson, but never really being exposed to his greatness. so i guess it's been a great learning experience these last two weeks or so, seeing him at his prime.
RIP, MJ.
Monday, June 29, 2009
6/29/2009 10:41:00 PM
GOD GRETCH, start listening to your own advice. you'd benefit from it.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
6/24/2009 01:41:00 PM
half the time i'm so tempted to just let it all out, but then i remember that the world is watching, and i just can't.
i had a moment though, last night. it felt so real, but then i realised that it was simply due to a change in scenery.
it's weird what these things can do to one's mentality.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
6/17/2009 01:57:00 PM
i think i take the whole angsty teenager thing to a whole new level.
stop hating the world, you moron. maybe only then you'll see that life is more than dark colours and sadism. bad habits aren't what life is all about, and you need to realise that before you start drowning in your own darkness.
yeah right, i've already started drowning. i'm six feet from the edge. but then again, maybe six feet ain't so far down eh?
Saturday, June 06, 2009
6/06/2009 09:29:00 AM
something is seriously, SERIOUSLY WRONG.
i think i had better find out what the hell it is (and why!) before anything else happens again.
Friday, May 29, 2009
5/29/2009 10:35:00 PM
after all those years of rejecting social norms, i think it's about time i started to embrace some of them.
i think at the end of the day, i'm beginning to realise that all those years of rejecting what people perceive as acceptable has resulted in a more detrimental outcome as opposed to a favourable one. i'm beginning to see what the future holds and trust me, it ain't pretty. the weird thing about it is that i've had so many head-smacking enlightenments, and yet it's taken so long for me to realise what's wrong.
am i rejecting individuality? yes, to a certain extent, if it goes against what's best. i never thought i'd ever say this, but maybe sometimes conforming to mass beliefs is indeed what's best in the long run. i'm not trading in my perceptions for a herd mentality, i'm simply revisiting the situation and hence have realised that maybe the herd mentality exists for a good reason.
am i a morbid individual? most definitely, but maybe i don't need to express it so outrightly, because i've had this double standard for such a long time that it's a good thing i'm doing this re-examination of the self.
i think it's going to take some time, but i'm getting there. i need to stop blaming everyone and everything apart from myself and re-examine the situation from a different perspective. it's been such a crazy past few years, with my mind travelling to places that i'm sure cannot be deemed healthy, and i'm not going to make false claims and say that it's never going back, but i guess i need to work at being the best i can possibly be.
is this idealism? maybe, but it's idealism for the greater good, both for myself and those around me. i need to stop longing and start doing, because passiveness never got anyone anywhere. i need to start being proactive, no matter how difficult it is, and start being completely shameless once again.
the plan may not be perfect, but at least it's a start.
Friday, May 22, 2009
5/22/2009 09:03:00 PM
yeah, i know i said that it didn't matter to me, but i'm kinda sad that adam didn't win. maybe because we all expected him to?
kris allen and his monkey faces can go back to conway because he beat out adam for the title. and OMG, i swear they made that stupid idol trophy just to punish him for winning because that thing is HIDEOUS.
ah, i'll get over it. poor adam.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
5/14/2009 07:45:00 PM
OH MY GOD.
kris and adam finals WHOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
i mean, both danny and kris are incredibly boring, but at least kris is a relevant kind of boring. i actually preferred his performance of apologize to heartless last night, but hey, i'm the adam lambert fan so i'm all for theatrics as opposed to understated talent. and as much as i absolutely HATE apologize, i thought kris did a good job, and thank god he dropped the horrendous falsetto in the chorus after a couple of shots at it.
and well, i hate heartless more than apologize. although i have to say i DO like love lockdown, which is kinda strange because i'm not even a kanye fan and that song has even more autotune and synthesizers than heartless does.
and every week my stomach goes into convulsions come thursday because i swear, i have not been this crazy over any idol contestant EVER. the closest i ever got to this was clay aiken back in season 2, which i think i've mentioned, and even then jessica and esti were much bigger fans than i was. plus that was clay aiken's pre-spamalot days and my pre-musical theatre adoration days, so i think i probably wasn't even half as crazy as i am right now. and if clay were to compete against adam, i'd pick adam hands down because he is FRIGGIN AWESOME and can outshriek and banshee. WHOOHOO.
yes, i like the shrieking. the only week i didn't like it was when he did if i can't have you from saturday night fever, because by stripping the song down to a ballad form he was pretty much removing all the theatrics of the disco era, and to throw in the scream was completely unnecessary. i liked his first performance more than his second one last night, because one by u2 is an ABSOLUTE SHOWSTOPPER. and i'm a much bigger fan of aerosmith stuff from later on in their career. (by the way, jaded? one of the BEST SONGS EVERRRRR.)
you know what? i don't even care if adam wins because regarless, he's going to get signed and will probably be the first to release an album. i think i'll probably get it, because even though yue qun says she's going to get it, i don't really trust her because she's the girl who's never bought a CD in her life. (and to think i'm FRIENDS with this girl!) i don't even care if it sucks, i'll probably get it because it's adam. although i can assure you that i won't be getting a danny gokey album anytime soon, i'm not a big fan of christian music. but if kris does that jason mraz thing that he seems to be doing, i might consider.
oh god, the last album i bought was kelly clarkson. but i guess it's partly because there hasn't been anything worth getting recently. green day comes out today, but i'm not that big a fan.
i'm almost hoping that adam comes out in drag next week, but i doubt it. you know, i almost feel sorry for the gay underground scene because now that adam's on idol he won't be doing anymore of those underground shows, and i swear ring of fire doesn't even come close to how totally WRONG those performances are. him dancing to womanizer? totally PRICELESS. he shakes his ass better than 95% of the world's female population. plus his originals on youtube have a sort of alternapop/glam rock feel to them, and i am a pretty big fan of that. i hope he goes all 80s on us because I LOVE THE 80s! almost as much as i love wicked, almost. but if his performances are anything to go by, it seems promising.
i think i need to stop going on and on about idol and adam, it's really not healthy. maybe i should post something on twitter, just to keep it going.
i'm way too trashy for my own good. katy perry, lady gaga, and now adam lambert? gee gretch, thank goodness you're a girl.
Monday, May 11, 2009
5/11/2009 11:11:00 AM
HELLO YOU.
i missed my blog's birthday this year for the first time, but i swear it was for a completely legitimate reason.
anyway, happy belated, blog. did you know you're older than the gosselin sextuplets?
yeah, i need to stop talking to my blog as if it's a living being. this is seriously not healthy.
by the way, i've discovered a few NEW ADDICTIONS. i've been hooked on cooking academy and wedding dash, and i'm sure i'm going to get hooked on other things sooner or later (but diner dash is so last year.). PLUS i've gotten completely addicted to jon and kate plus 8. yes, i know i've always liked it and i've been watching it for about a year and a half now, but now that the kids are four (on the show, in real life they're approaching five. oh my god, they're FIVE.) they're actually a lot more entertaining than they were before when they were about two.
yes, i like to watch kids on TV. handling them on the other hand? might be a different story.
if we could just edit real life wouldn't it make everything just perfect? (wait, that was a dumb question.)
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
4/22/2009 12:26:00 PM
tsk gretch, bitchy as always.
one day karma is going to come back and hit your square between the eyes before biting you on the ass. just you wait.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
4/12/2009 09:14:00 PM
oh my god gretch you pathetic loser stop fretting over something so completely irrelevant.
suck it up, embrace it and go do something with your life dammit.
and yes, once again the broken record thing applies.
4/12/2009 03:04:00 PM
oh my god gretch, stop obsessing. you sound like a broken record.
